If it is a pole barn structure, the building will be supported by columns which will have their own pier support, the interior concrete slab is structurally independent of the building load so barring any high point loads on the slab from machinery or interior structure ( ie: car lifts, mezzanine columns etc.) a 4" slab would be sufficient although it would have to haunched at the exterior walls and possibly at interior wall locations as well if first floor ceiling will be a load bearing surface (2nd floor, storage attic etc.)
However there are multiple variations of metal buildings so there is a lot of unanswered questions here. Not to mention your use of the term Barndominium seems like a play on condominium which would entail a multi-family residence and specific requirements for fire separation between units among other things. Be aware that fire-stopping becomes a very intricate issue in the situation you describe.
The eave height is dependent on the desired interior height, the length of the overhang and the slope of the roof which all work together to determine the final T.O.P. height.